I am the "Mom" of a blended family. There is me, my Dh, my two kids from a previous marriage, his two kids from a previous marriage, his step son from another one of his previous marriages and then we have our 5 yr old daughter. Several years ago when I accepted this role I had heard it had it's difficulties, but they were far outweighed by the advantages. Well I'm here to tell you that is complete and udder bullshit. IF I had known then what I know now, I'd have ran like hell when he asked me out the first time and told him to go to hell. I can say this much, it's been a learning experience and I will NEVER EVER do this again. I'm not saying that me and my Dh are going to split, but he's 17 yrs older than me, I see me living far longer than he does.
As I mentioned, I have two stepdaughters. My Dh thinks they walk on water or some shit. They can do no wrong in his eyes. If you tell him they do, he'll make a half assed attempt to uncover the truth, and if it's in their favor, that's where it stops. If it's not though, he'll keep digging till he can find someone to blow smoke up his ass so he can think they did no wrong. Well I recant part of that, he won't with the oldest one anymore, he can't. She's out of the house and well she's pulled so much shit that he pretty much believes it when someone tells him some dumbass thing she's done. Now the other one, well that's what the above applies to. He used to do it with the oldest one till I blew the cover off that and made him look like a total ass which he really didn't appreciate, but oh well, I needed the gratification of being right after being told I was picking on her, being too hard on her, and basically being called a downright liar.
I thought I had opened his eyes but I suppose not. Quite frankly it's starting all over but with the youngest step daughter. She turned 16 last November and after she got her driver's license it all went downhill again. Up to that point, it was looking like he had his head on straight and was doing a pretty good job of being partial to the fact that she can (and most definitely) is a little shit. I was quite proud of him and let him know that quite frequently. I had to basically give up MY car so she could have a vehicle to drive. Then came her putting a shitwad of gas through it and him paying for it, which was fine....till he had to start getting money from me to cover other shit. As I have mentioned, I have 3 jobs, I work anywhere from 52-70 hours a week. He has ONE job, 40 hours a week. Stepdaughter BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA her work.....ya right I see that happening anytime soon but that's a blog for another date and time (which will be soon I promise). Back to the car thing though, I have my truck, so wasn't that big of an issue (ok it was but I regress on that for the time being, and it was all me being selfish and yes I'm very selfish when it comes to certain things but I regress). Well then there came him buying another car for her to drive. *See Dh and the great car debate entry for that story. Well his excuse for that was that this car was cheaper on gas. Hmmmm I don't think so but whatever, I am no longer giving him any $$$ for anything I don't specifically request him to pick up.
Well since she got her license in November I've had several people stop me when I'm out and about and tell me that she's driving like an idiot (in some cases they thought it was me since it was my car). I tell Dh and he blows me off pretty much, or if he actually does say anything to her it's "Knock that shit off". Well tonight it's really got me riled up. I got a call from the highway patrol of a case of road rage. They came into the city limits, and so they called for our officers to watch for them. Guess who's license plate number they gave me? BINGO, my stepdaughters. Well called Dh into the office (ya we work in the same office) and told him. He promptly called step daughter and she told him she hadn't been out that way, she had been with a friend since after school blah blah blah. SON OF A BITCH....what does he do? "Oh ok, just checking" He did call her friend she was with but of course, she holds up for step daughters story. That's what teenage girls do when a parent calls...."Oh ya she was with me...Nooooo she wasn't on the highway south of town...nuh uh, she was with me" I used to be one, I know, I did it many times myself for friends. Then what do I hear? and this is the part where I get so mad I could pinch both their heads off......literally. "Oh you know her one friend is mad at her, she probably called it in to the highway patrol trying to get her into trouble" WTF ever dude, she's playing you and your believing her. Friday she came home giggling about doing the same kind of shit on her way home from going to the next town over to drop my kids off at their Dad's and so step son could pick me up some stuff from town since I wasn't feeling the best. Saturday night she pulled another stunt...told us she went to the truck stop after the game. What she failed to mention is she went to the next town over too. How did I find this out? Well I happened to see a lady that I used to work with and she started going on about how time flies, she didn't realize that she was driving blah blah blah. Then I dumbly asked, "Oh when did you see her Lisa?" "Saturday night when me and my son ran to get ice cream at Country Mart there in town...I thought she looked familiar sitting at the stoplight next to me and said something about her looking familiar and he told me that was your step daughter...I didn't realize she was that old yet, guess I was thinking of your other daughter" Well I dumbly told her that No it couldn't have been her, as she was cheering that night then went to the truck stop, then home. Lisa looked at me and told me she was pretty sure that her son was right, but whatever, it may not have been. Well then I got the brainstorm, check her IM logs. Guess what I found...yup that she had cheered at the game, went to the truck stop and went to the next town. A minor indiscretion, I was miffed but more because I had made an ass of myself to Lisa, and basically called her a liar. I have to remember to apologize to her next time I see her btw. I haven't mentioned that to Dh yet, and I'm not going to for a day or so either since I'm so mad about this. I did mention that she did the same thing Friday though, to which I was met with a dumb stare. Then him checking his phone for what time she called him which was like a minute before I got the call from the highway patrol. I just looked at him and had there not been 4 other people in the office said "What the fuck ever you wanna believe, but I think it was her" but I think he knows that I still don't believe her and I'm miffed at him. Why? Because he is now avoiding me like I'm a leper or something. That's what he does when he knows I'm gonna say something he doesn't like or doesn't want to believe.
I know kids are going to be doing stupid shit. I know kids are going to lie to their parents about stupid shit they do. I expect that. I know my kids do it. I am also on their asses about whatever they are doing wrong. I also expect that as adults, we need to investigate fully and if in doubt, ground that kid, cos they are probably guilty of that or something else we've not caught them at in the past and still deserve it one way or another. I've never heard of a week with no tv, phone or Internet killing anyone either ;). I also expect that a parent isn't going to stick their head in the sand and deny that their kid does any wrong.
So I forsee...several things in my very VERY near future. I see the top of my head blowing off soon for one. I also forsee anti-anxiety, antidepressants, and whatever else the dr prescribes for me also in my future. If I were to talk too much to anyone right now, I'd see a possible 96 hour mental health commitment in the future as well. Shoot them reading this blog would probably give them probable cause to do it (not that I'd resist any). I see me possibly well most likely checking up on stepdaughter and her driving habits. Ya I'm a conniving bitch sometimes, but if she's not doing anything wrong, she has nothing to hide now does she? I see several fights with my Dh in the near future if/when/after I catch her in the act. I see me learning from his mistakes he's making. I see me becoming even stricter with my kids.
Monday, March 3, 2008
Thursday, February 21, 2008
Jihad on Double Stuff Oreo's
First things first...Update on Gramma: She's doing wonderfully! She broke her femur just below the joint that goes into the hip socket. They replaced that with a brand spankin' shiny new joint. She's been moved into the rehab unit of the hospital, and they are doing intensive therapy on her 3 hours in the morning and 3 hours in the afternoon. She'll be there for a couple of weeks then moved into a nursing home for further therapy. Can you say WHEW? I'm so relieved.
Now on to more amusing things....
We're having our 2nd major ice storm of the new year and yet again I'm SOOOOOO lucky to have my kids home with me. Well all of them but my 5 yr old who's spending the remainder of this week and part of the weekend with her godparents.
After doing morning chores my son Ty, who is 14 and I'm convinced is hollow at this point, comes in "I'm hungry". Hmphf, big surprise there. He knew I'd went to the grocery store yesterday, so food is not lacking in this house at the moment. He promptly went to the counter and found my MY double stuffed Oreo's and cracked the package open. Well that's ok, it was one of those things where I was PMSing and bought them then had a salt craving...they've been sitting in my truck for upwards of 2-3 weeks now. Upon hearing the package crinkle my 12 yr old daughter, Destiny, hollers "What's that noise?!?" and had to come in the kitchen to investigate. Katie at that point, the resident 16 yr old daughter, "What's going on over there?"(She's kinda oblivious to things sometimes...go figure) and then she proceeds to the counter as well. Gary, my Dh's 27 yr old son, looks at me, looks at them, then meanders over that way.
Ok so now I have 4 kids clustered around my counter, attacking the package of Double Stuffed Oreo's. Looked like buzzards flocked into my kitchen on a carcass. No way was I going over there to break it up. I'd loose an arm or something.
So that got me to thinking...and bear with me, my mind works weird ok. Jihad, hmmm.... I know Jihad means:
1. Islam. An individual's striving for spiritual self-perfection.
2. Islam. A Muslim holy war or spiritual struggle against infidels.
3. A crusade or struggle: “The war against smoking is turning into a jihad against people who smoke” (Fortune).
-definition thanks to http://www.answers.com/topic/jihad
My first thought was "Holy mother of Mary...what did did the Oreo's do to deserve that?!?"
My second thought looking at the mangled package lying on the counter....hmmmm if we could get Al Qaeda members (particularly Bin Laden) addicted to Oreo's, I could send our kids out and viola'.....he'd be an easy target then. All they'd have to look for is the mangled remains of a package of Double Stuffed Oreo's and a dazed and confused old guy with a 3 ft beard lying in the mountains or desert. Easy pickin's for them then.
Third thought and the one I voiced "Kids, get in here and clean up this damned mess you made!"
Now on to more amusing things....
We're having our 2nd major ice storm of the new year and yet again I'm SOOOOOO lucky to have my kids home with me. Well all of them but my 5 yr old who's spending the remainder of this week and part of the weekend with her godparents.
After doing morning chores my son Ty, who is 14 and I'm convinced is hollow at this point, comes in "I'm hungry". Hmphf, big surprise there. He knew I'd went to the grocery store yesterday, so food is not lacking in this house at the moment. He promptly went to the counter and found my MY double stuffed Oreo's and cracked the package open. Well that's ok, it was one of those things where I was PMSing and bought them then had a salt craving...they've been sitting in my truck for upwards of 2-3 weeks now. Upon hearing the package crinkle my 12 yr old daughter, Destiny, hollers "What's that noise?!?" and had to come in the kitchen to investigate. Katie at that point, the resident 16 yr old daughter, "What's going on over there?"(She's kinda oblivious to things sometimes...go figure) and then she proceeds to the counter as well. Gary, my Dh's 27 yr old son, looks at me, looks at them, then meanders over that way.
Ok so now I have 4 kids clustered around my counter, attacking the package of Double Stuffed Oreo's. Looked like buzzards flocked into my kitchen on a carcass. No way was I going over there to break it up. I'd loose an arm or something.
So that got me to thinking...and bear with me, my mind works weird ok. Jihad, hmmm.... I know Jihad means:
1. Islam. An individual's striving for spiritual self-perfection.
2. Islam. A Muslim holy war or spiritual struggle against infidels.
3. A crusade or struggle: “The war against smoking is turning into a jihad against people who smoke” (Fortune).
-definition thanks to http://www.answers.com/topic/jihad
My first thought was "Holy mother of Mary...what did did the Oreo's do to deserve that?!?"
My second thought looking at the mangled package lying on the counter....hmmmm if we could get Al Qaeda members (particularly Bin Laden) addicted to Oreo's, I could send our kids out and viola'.....he'd be an easy target then. All they'd have to look for is the mangled remains of a package of Double Stuffed Oreo's and a dazed and confused old guy with a 3 ft beard lying in the mountains or desert. Easy pickin's for them then.
Third thought and the one I voiced "Kids, get in here and clean up this damned mess you made!"
Saturday, February 16, 2008
Scared....
Scared......not a word I usually associate with myself, but tonight yes definately.
Phone rings at work, private line, and it's my Dad's fiancee'
"Shit your working"
Rut roh Spanky, I don't like the way THAT sounds as a phone converstation starter...
"Yup, sure am, or else I wouldn't have answered the phone here at the PD huh? *chuckle* What's up? Everything ok?"
"NO it isn't *pause*
"Dammit, how'd I know you were going to say that? What's wrong? Are you ok? OMG Dad's not had a wreck has he, please tell me he hasn't wrecked"
"No no, I'm fine, and your Dad hasn't crashed his semi again BUT ....*long pause*"
"Woman, don't do that, it scares me. What's the matter, what the hell is going on?"
"It's your Gramma"
At that point my heart dropped to my toes, and I started feeling my stomach tightening up.....
"OH NO, what? WHAT? WHAAAATTTTT? How bad is it?"
"Well not sure.....She fell today and and while I don't know too much yet, she's most definately badly bruised her replaced knee, her hip and her elbow. All I know is her and Dad (Grampa) stopped to get a get well card for a friend in the hospital, and when she came out to get in the car she went down, hit her knee, then her hip, and caught herself with her elbow"
Whew, while that's definately not good, I was expecting far worse in all honesty...
"Oh no, did she break anything?"
"Don't know yet for sure, but possibly"
Ok my Gramma is 91 years old with late stage osteoporosis, she fell on pavement, the chances are pretty good something broke or cracked.
"I was hoping you'd be able to go down to the hospital in Mtn Home with me tonight but since your at work guess not huh?"
"No because we don't have anyone to fill in unfortunately, I might be able to get someone for tomorrow night though, not sure I'll have to make a phone call or two to see if he can do it."
"Guess you won't be able to go down tomorrow either then if you have to work. *sigh*"
"Oh like hell I won't, what time do you want to leave? I can sleep while you drive if I can't find someone to work."
"OH I shoulda expected that shouldn't I have?"
No shit Sherlock, this is my Gramma, my hero, the woman who has taught me so much, and yet I have a suspicion has forgotten more than I'll ever begin to know, she ranks third only below #1 God & #2 my children....I will be there even if it means forfeiting a few hours of sleep
"Uh DUH ya this is GRAMMA we're talking about, so what time do you want to leave?"
Well after that we got into the mundane conversation of the logistics of our trip to the hospital and all that jazz.
Now as I mentioned my Gramma is 91 years old. She's lived through the Great Depression, mumps, measels, not one but TWO lightning strikes (the second one rendered her blind for 6 months and almost killed her), two very difficult pregnancies, loosing her husband (my paternal Grandfather) due to a massive brain aneurism that left him in a brain dead state with no hope of recovery, she had to make the decision to take him off life support facing having to raise my Dad and Aunt (ages 11 and 9 at the time) having over 200 acres of crops in the field to look after and the farm animals that made their living, 5 step children and another husband, 27 (no that's not a typo) surgeries over the years some major & thankfully most not, my Dad about being killed in a semi accident almost 37 years ago, loosing two step children to fatal accidents (one in 1957, and one in 2007) and I'm sure many other trying times and incidents that I'm not even aware of. She's my hero. No other way to say it. There is nobody in this world I look up to more or respect more than my Grandmother.
A few years ago she had to have rotator cuff surgery, which for most is a relatively minor surgery. Her's was a bit more serious as she has COPD and the anesthesia was a concern. Luckily they were in their winter home of Arkansas so I could go to be there just in case something happened. The surgery went wonderfully, a complete success. I was a nervous wreck as it took her a little while longer than expected to come out of the anesthesia and as soon as they said she could have visitors, I made a beeline for her room. I was totally unprepared for the sight that met me there. I was expecting her to be groggy, the IV's, the monitor equipment....sure. What I wasn't expecting was my normally vibrant, active Gramma to look so fragile. She had fallen back asleep in the few minutes it took that nurse to come and get us. She looked comfortable yes, but so vunerable at the same time. According to my Dad, my face went ashen and he couldn't begin to explain my expression, he said my face drained of color and just went slack. He seriously thought I was going to faint. That's when Gramma's age hit me, she was old. Even worse, our time was short with her. I smoothed her short permed white hair back like I would one of my children's when they were sick and she woke up. I guess my face was still pretty blank and she reached for me and said "Child, I'm ok, are you?" I couldn't speak very well but I managed to mumble "Ya I'm fine, I uhhhh wellll....." and she said "Ya honey, I'm old, we don't look so great when we're waking up" and chuckled. Oh the sound of that familiar laugh, it lifted all the weight off my shoulders, I KNEW Gramma was going to be ok then. Then she scared me, she asked everyone but me to leave. My Aunt, Dad, my Dh and her nurse all left and it was just me and her. She asked me to write down my full name and social security number and I did but I had to ask why. She just said that she needed them for some legal paperwork, her will. I told her I didn't want anything but her, whatever she was putting in there to give to the Dr's to keep her going for years to come. She smiled and looked at me with the MOST serene, thoughtful look I've EVER seen and said "Oh my dear dear girl, you've always been Grandma's girl haven't you?" "Yes Gramma, forever and always, you know that" in not much more than a whisper, it was all I could manage as I felt like my heart was being twisted. "Dear C, I'm old when God calls for me, I have no choice in the matter. You understand that day is coming don't you?" I couldn't speak, all I could do was hold her hand in both of mine and nod as a scared child would. "Good, now I've lived a magnificent, though at times, difficult life. I'm tired, I'm ready to go home. Not out of malice or spite mind you, but I am just tired. I don't expect you to understand, your still a child, but one day you will....." At that point the nurse knocked on the door because she needed to take Gramma's temp again, and the rest of my family came back in. Of all of the conversations I've had in my short life of 32 years, that one scared me the most of all. It was my realization that while Gramma is tough, she's not invincible and someday I will loose her too. The last few years I have made peace with that as I've watched her age. I'm not looking forward to it, and I'll do anything in my power to postpone it out of sheer selfishness.
Now we face surgery #28, and well.......
I'm scared....but I will be there no matter how scared I am, because this is MY Gramma.
Phone rings at work, private line, and it's my Dad's fiancee'
"Shit your working"
Rut roh Spanky, I don't like the way THAT sounds as a phone converstation starter...
"Yup, sure am, or else I wouldn't have answered the phone here at the PD huh? *chuckle* What's up? Everything ok?"
"NO it isn't *pause*
"Dammit, how'd I know you were going to say that? What's wrong? Are you ok? OMG Dad's not had a wreck has he, please tell me he hasn't wrecked"
"No no, I'm fine, and your Dad hasn't crashed his semi again BUT ....*long pause*"
"Woman, don't do that, it scares me. What's the matter, what the hell is going on?"
"It's your Gramma"
At that point my heart dropped to my toes, and I started feeling my stomach tightening up.....
"OH NO, what? WHAT? WHAAAATTTTT? How bad is it?"
"Well not sure.....She fell today and and while I don't know too much yet, she's most definately badly bruised her replaced knee, her hip and her elbow. All I know is her and Dad (Grampa) stopped to get a get well card for a friend in the hospital, and when she came out to get in the car she went down, hit her knee, then her hip, and caught herself with her elbow"
Whew, while that's definately not good, I was expecting far worse in all honesty...
"Oh no, did she break anything?"
"Don't know yet for sure, but possibly"
Ok my Gramma is 91 years old with late stage osteoporosis, she fell on pavement, the chances are pretty good something broke or cracked.
"I was hoping you'd be able to go down to the hospital in Mtn Home with me tonight but since your at work guess not huh?"
"No because we don't have anyone to fill in unfortunately, I might be able to get someone for tomorrow night though, not sure I'll have to make a phone call or two to see if he can do it."
"Guess you won't be able to go down tomorrow either then if you have to work. *sigh*"
"Oh like hell I won't, what time do you want to leave? I can sleep while you drive if I can't find someone to work."
"OH I shoulda expected that shouldn't I have?"
No shit Sherlock, this is my Gramma, my hero, the woman who has taught me so much, and yet I have a suspicion has forgotten more than I'll ever begin to know, she ranks third only below #1 God & #2 my children....I will be there even if it means forfeiting a few hours of sleep
"Uh DUH ya this is GRAMMA we're talking about, so what time do you want to leave?"
Well after that we got into the mundane conversation of the logistics of our trip to the hospital and all that jazz.
Now as I mentioned my Gramma is 91 years old. She's lived through the Great Depression, mumps, measels, not one but TWO lightning strikes (the second one rendered her blind for 6 months and almost killed her), two very difficult pregnancies, loosing her husband (my paternal Grandfather) due to a massive brain aneurism that left him in a brain dead state with no hope of recovery, she had to make the decision to take him off life support facing having to raise my Dad and Aunt (ages 11 and 9 at the time) having over 200 acres of crops in the field to look after and the farm animals that made their living, 5 step children and another husband, 27 (no that's not a typo) surgeries over the years some major & thankfully most not, my Dad about being killed in a semi accident almost 37 years ago, loosing two step children to fatal accidents (one in 1957, and one in 2007) and I'm sure many other trying times and incidents that I'm not even aware of. She's my hero. No other way to say it. There is nobody in this world I look up to more or respect more than my Grandmother.
A few years ago she had to have rotator cuff surgery, which for most is a relatively minor surgery. Her's was a bit more serious as she has COPD and the anesthesia was a concern. Luckily they were in their winter home of Arkansas so I could go to be there just in case something happened. The surgery went wonderfully, a complete success. I was a nervous wreck as it took her a little while longer than expected to come out of the anesthesia and as soon as they said she could have visitors, I made a beeline for her room. I was totally unprepared for the sight that met me there. I was expecting her to be groggy, the IV's, the monitor equipment....sure. What I wasn't expecting was my normally vibrant, active Gramma to look so fragile. She had fallen back asleep in the few minutes it took that nurse to come and get us. She looked comfortable yes, but so vunerable at the same time. According to my Dad, my face went ashen and he couldn't begin to explain my expression, he said my face drained of color and just went slack. He seriously thought I was going to faint. That's when Gramma's age hit me, she was old. Even worse, our time was short with her. I smoothed her short permed white hair back like I would one of my children's when they were sick and she woke up. I guess my face was still pretty blank and she reached for me and said "Child, I'm ok, are you?" I couldn't speak very well but I managed to mumble "Ya I'm fine, I uhhhh wellll....." and she said "Ya honey, I'm old, we don't look so great when we're waking up" and chuckled. Oh the sound of that familiar laugh, it lifted all the weight off my shoulders, I KNEW Gramma was going to be ok then. Then she scared me, she asked everyone but me to leave. My Aunt, Dad, my Dh and her nurse all left and it was just me and her. She asked me to write down my full name and social security number and I did but I had to ask why. She just said that she needed them for some legal paperwork, her will. I told her I didn't want anything but her, whatever she was putting in there to give to the Dr's to keep her going for years to come. She smiled and looked at me with the MOST serene, thoughtful look I've EVER seen and said "Oh my dear dear girl, you've always been Grandma's girl haven't you?" "Yes Gramma, forever and always, you know that" in not much more than a whisper, it was all I could manage as I felt like my heart was being twisted. "Dear C, I'm old when God calls for me, I have no choice in the matter. You understand that day is coming don't you?" I couldn't speak, all I could do was hold her hand in both of mine and nod as a scared child would. "Good, now I've lived a magnificent, though at times, difficult life. I'm tired, I'm ready to go home. Not out of malice or spite mind you, but I am just tired. I don't expect you to understand, your still a child, but one day you will....." At that point the nurse knocked on the door because she needed to take Gramma's temp again, and the rest of my family came back in. Of all of the conversations I've had in my short life of 32 years, that one scared me the most of all. It was my realization that while Gramma is tough, she's not invincible and someday I will loose her too. The last few years I have made peace with that as I've watched her age. I'm not looking forward to it, and I'll do anything in my power to postpone it out of sheer selfishness.
Now we face surgery #28, and well.......
I'm scared....but I will be there no matter how scared I am, because this is MY Gramma.
Sunday, February 10, 2008
Dh and the great used car debate
Used car........two very small words but when paired together can cause monumental apprehension to people. Being me those words have never frightened me probably for the fact that I know just enough about vehicles to know when someone is blowing smoke up my neather regions. New car strikes more fear for me because I know the insurance is going to be just about as much as the monthly car payment.
Last week there was a disagreement of the minds around my house. My wonderful Dh had decided to purchase a used car from one of our co-workers. No problem as I know this co worker well enough to know he wasn't going to sell us something that was a POS. Sure it needs a little work but for $1,100 and the parts we need already being purchased, who could complain (especially when we could do the work ourselves as the repair is a reliatively minor job). Where the disagreement came from was about WHO is going to be driving this little gem. Dh's truck is starting to have a few motor issues and I was under the impression he was going to drive this car. Apparently Dh had told his 16 yr old daughter she could drive it. Now he had mentioned that idea and I told him my answer would depend on what it did to our insurance....she could drive one of the cars (either mine or the one he was about to purchase) but it had to be the one that was cheapest on the insurance. He seemed to agree with that and we went about our daily lives. Sitting at my computer last week imagine my surprize when I got informed by my 16 yr old step daughter that Daddy was buying this car for her. I was pissed. Not for the fact so much that he supposedly was buying this car for "her" I later realized but for several other reasons. Some having to do directly with her but most not. #1 She's been driving MY car for months now which is a minor inconvience to me sometimes as it's all we have that comfortably fits the other kids but I have my truck to drive and I don't take ALL the kids places very often #2 I've been pushing for 6 months for this girl to get a job to help pay these extra bills associated with her driving (my insurance jumped $40 a month just to insure her and lets not even get started on how much gas she's putting through my car and all the miles she's putting on it) #3 We have 5 kids at home, and in the next 4 years we'll have two more 16 year olds and now they are going to expect (and rightfully so now that he's done this) us to provide them with cars #4 I work 3 jobs......yes you read that right 3 jobs. I have my "real" job here at the PD, my 2nd job where I put in between 4-20 hours a week at Dollar General, and my 3rd job waiting tables at the local cafe that was previously my "real" job prior to the PD. Money was tight due to some medical bills, legal bills and the upcoming holidays so I worked in the area of 60-70 hrs some weeks to cover everything. Now excuse me if I'm a bit cranky when it comes to my wonderful Dh and his daughter spending MY money a bit loosely for non essential items (like $40 worth of gas every week for her to have the privelige of putting miles on my car). So when I got informed that this was going to be "HER" car, my blood boiled. Not a picturesque simmer of water for spagetti, a rolling sterilizing medical instrements kind of boil. I did not unleash my wrath on the child as I realized that this was her father's doing and I needed to take it up with him. Now it's not my money that bought the car, but my paychecks are the ones going into the joint checking account that the car insurance comes out of. Dh rarely if ever puts money into it, so at that point forsaw ME paying the extra insurance. Well Dh got home and I promptly followed him into the bedroom and gave him about 5 minutes to unwind and demanded answers. He assured me he didn't buy the car to give to the girl, but rather he had told her she could drive it. When I asked about the insurance his face went blank. He admitted he just ASSUMED that I'd cover it. Ehhhh wrong answer, try again. He very quickly got informed that I'd be putting my paychecks into my private bank account and then I'd put enough in joint checking to cover what the insurance premium is now....whatever the insurance went up, him and his daughter were responsible for. I got a sincere "Yes dear..." and again our lives went on.
Well the car came home Friday. The 16 year old was being royally annoying with her excitement. I was still a bit miffed and hadn't really put my finger on why....till a couple hours later. For 10 years me and Dh have been together, and we've had to start pretty much from scratch which meant giving up some of the things I'd have liked to have had. For years I've wanted a fast sports car. Not some new off the dealer lot kind of fast car, but rather a old muscle car kind of car. Again I got pushed to the back for someone else and well it pissed me off considering all the hours I've been working to pay bills that technically weren't even mine. Lets just say I was feeling a little jilted and put on the back burner. So when Dh came in, I again laid into him asking when I got my new car. That's when he made the worst mistake he could have........he LAUGHED. Then he saw the look on my face and realized the mistake. I was so mad I was near tears. The the "well when you find something let me know" started. I told him to kiss my white ass at that point and stomped in to the bedroom to get ready for work. He dutifuly came in about 10 minutes later and said "Really, I meant it...I really did...." Internally I was cursing him with words my Marine grandfather would blush at but I just looked at him. Not sure how as I was trying to keep my teeth from biting though my lower lip at that point.
Flash forward to last night:
Dh came home from work and I was happily tapping on my faithful keyboard. We went through our post work chit chat and fell into the normal routine we have in the evenings. Now we are having an ice storm from hell and he was worried about the grocery situation as it looks like the roads will be horrid the next few days. As I'm getting ready to go to town with him, I told him "Heeeeeyyyy remember the other day?"
"Uhhh ummmm no. What?"
"Ya ya do, the one where I wanted to whap you upside the head with my tennis racket"
"Um dear, you wanted to do that several days last week I think, that doesn't help"
"The car discussion day..."
"OHHHH THAT day...ya I won't forget that for awhile. Oh boy, what did you find?"
"Nothing that I can afford quite yet but I do know what I want"
He sat on the bed with the deer in headlights look
"Remember dear, a '69 Vette isn't going to handle our road well and well you'd have to get another job to pay the insurance"
"Ya I know, not what I have in mind...."
"Pass me some of your Excedrin please, I think I'm going to need it"
"Nah, I want a '76 or a '79 Pontiac Firebird....V8, manual, with a limited slip differential, and the original honey comb wheels...preferably dark blue, black or dark dark red. Keep your ears open and ask Terry and some of the other guys to also....ok?"
He passed out....I win (I think)
Last week there was a disagreement of the minds around my house. My wonderful Dh had decided to purchase a used car from one of our co-workers. No problem as I know this co worker well enough to know he wasn't going to sell us something that was a POS. Sure it needs a little work but for $1,100 and the parts we need already being purchased, who could complain (especially when we could do the work ourselves as the repair is a reliatively minor job). Where the disagreement came from was about WHO is going to be driving this little gem. Dh's truck is starting to have a few motor issues and I was under the impression he was going to drive this car. Apparently Dh had told his 16 yr old daughter she could drive it. Now he had mentioned that idea and I told him my answer would depend on what it did to our insurance....she could drive one of the cars (either mine or the one he was about to purchase) but it had to be the one that was cheapest on the insurance. He seemed to agree with that and we went about our daily lives. Sitting at my computer last week imagine my surprize when I got informed by my 16 yr old step daughter that Daddy was buying this car for her. I was pissed. Not for the fact so much that he supposedly was buying this car for "her" I later realized but for several other reasons. Some having to do directly with her but most not. #1 She's been driving MY car for months now which is a minor inconvience to me sometimes as it's all we have that comfortably fits the other kids but I have my truck to drive and I don't take ALL the kids places very often #2 I've been pushing for 6 months for this girl to get a job to help pay these extra bills associated with her driving (my insurance jumped $40 a month just to insure her and lets not even get started on how much gas she's putting through my car and all the miles she's putting on it) #3 We have 5 kids at home, and in the next 4 years we'll have two more 16 year olds and now they are going to expect (and rightfully so now that he's done this) us to provide them with cars #4 I work 3 jobs......yes you read that right 3 jobs. I have my "real" job here at the PD, my 2nd job where I put in between 4-20 hours a week at Dollar General, and my 3rd job waiting tables at the local cafe that was previously my "real" job prior to the PD. Money was tight due to some medical bills, legal bills and the upcoming holidays so I worked in the area of 60-70 hrs some weeks to cover everything. Now excuse me if I'm a bit cranky when it comes to my wonderful Dh and his daughter spending MY money a bit loosely for non essential items (like $40 worth of gas every week for her to have the privelige of putting miles on my car). So when I got informed that this was going to be "HER" car, my blood boiled. Not a picturesque simmer of water for spagetti, a rolling sterilizing medical instrements kind of boil. I did not unleash my wrath on the child as I realized that this was her father's doing and I needed to take it up with him. Now it's not my money that bought the car, but my paychecks are the ones going into the joint checking account that the car insurance comes out of. Dh rarely if ever puts money into it, so at that point forsaw ME paying the extra insurance. Well Dh got home and I promptly followed him into the bedroom and gave him about 5 minutes to unwind and demanded answers. He assured me he didn't buy the car to give to the girl, but rather he had told her she could drive it. When I asked about the insurance his face went blank. He admitted he just ASSUMED that I'd cover it. Ehhhh wrong answer, try again. He very quickly got informed that I'd be putting my paychecks into my private bank account and then I'd put enough in joint checking to cover what the insurance premium is now....whatever the insurance went up, him and his daughter were responsible for. I got a sincere "Yes dear..." and again our lives went on.
Well the car came home Friday. The 16 year old was being royally annoying with her excitement. I was still a bit miffed and hadn't really put my finger on why....till a couple hours later. For 10 years me and Dh have been together, and we've had to start pretty much from scratch which meant giving up some of the things I'd have liked to have had. For years I've wanted a fast sports car. Not some new off the dealer lot kind of fast car, but rather a old muscle car kind of car. Again I got pushed to the back for someone else and well it pissed me off considering all the hours I've been working to pay bills that technically weren't even mine. Lets just say I was feeling a little jilted and put on the back burner. So when Dh came in, I again laid into him asking when I got my new car. That's when he made the worst mistake he could have........he LAUGHED. Then he saw the look on my face and realized the mistake. I was so mad I was near tears. The the "well when you find something let me know" started. I told him to kiss my white ass at that point and stomped in to the bedroom to get ready for work. He dutifuly came in about 10 minutes later and said "Really, I meant it...I really did...." Internally I was cursing him with words my Marine grandfather would blush at but I just looked at him. Not sure how as I was trying to keep my teeth from biting though my lower lip at that point.
Flash forward to last night:
Dh came home from work and I was happily tapping on my faithful keyboard. We went through our post work chit chat and fell into the normal routine we have in the evenings. Now we are having an ice storm from hell and he was worried about the grocery situation as it looks like the roads will be horrid the next few days. As I'm getting ready to go to town with him, I told him "Heeeeeyyyy remember the other day?"
"Uhhh ummmm no. What?"
"Ya ya do, the one where I wanted to whap you upside the head with my tennis racket"
"Um dear, you wanted to do that several days last week I think, that doesn't help"
"The car discussion day..."
"OHHHH THAT day...ya I won't forget that for awhile. Oh boy, what did you find?"
"Nothing that I can afford quite yet but I do know what I want"
He sat on the bed with the deer in headlights look
"Remember dear, a '69 Vette isn't going to handle our road well and well you'd have to get another job to pay the insurance"
"Ya I know, not what I have in mind...."
"Pass me some of your Excedrin please, I think I'm going to need it"
"Nah, I want a '76 or a '79 Pontiac Firebird....V8, manual, with a limited slip differential, and the original honey comb wheels...preferably dark blue, black or dark dark red. Keep your ears open and ask Terry and some of the other guys to also....ok?"
He passed out....I win (I think)
Saturday, February 9, 2008
Ahhhh spring in the Ozarks.....pfffftttttt
Spring is well on it's way to us here in the southern Missouri Ozarks. How do I know this? Easy, work tells me it's so. I had my suspicions last weekend due to the craziness we encountered, but this weekend (and this weekend is just beginning) confirmed my fear.
Being a lowly police/fire dispatcher isn't as bad as one might think most of the time. Ya ya we have to deal with the occasional life threating situation, but as long as you keep your head on your shoulders and don't freak out things go pretty smoothly. Dealing with the disgruntled public, thats another thing that's just part of the nature of the beast. Let them vent, answer their questions and if worse comes to worse, tell them that if they can't be sensible, there isn't much you can do to help them....if all else fails, while they are threating your job hang up on them. Yes it's probably rude, but living in a town of 2,500 people, it's not THAT surprizing if you know the mayor and everyone on city counsel and doesn't mean your THAT important. No we can't tell them that per se, but we certainly aren't expected to put up with verbal assaults over the telephone either because we can't tell them they are being an idiot. Most of the time, our shifts are pretty boring and that's good. Until spring......that's when the unsavory characters start crawling out from under their rocks.....OHHHHH GOODIE. There is an upside to that though. It's an ego boost. You realize that while you have your faults, they could be oh so much worse. Tonight was one of those nights for me most certainly.
Being a Friday night, we (me and my on duty officer) were expecting to have to work. Nothing unusual we've become accustomed to that and actually look forward to it since the rest of our week is usually pretty boring. Now that being said, our night didn't start quite on the note we would have prefered. I got here first as I came in a half hour early so the guy I was taking over for could go home and feed his cows during daylight. There was a note for my night officer from a local manager at a local factory, didn't think too much about it. My officer came in about 15 minutes after I did and I gave him his note and went back to my chatting. After calling the guy that left the message, he left to go do a well being check on a fellow that lives in one of the local slum apartment buildings. The guy hadn't shown up for work the last 4 days and they were getting concerned. Well he went to check, the guy's car wasn't there, no one answered the door when he knocked, no funky odors met him at the door, all seemed well. Nothing more he could do, unless we have pretty good evidence of something hinky going on, we can't go kicking in doors and breaking into personal residences....that pesky 4th amendment prohibits us from that, go figure. I got a call from the officer telling me what he'd found out (or lack of what he'd found) and asked me to call the guy's landlord to see if he knew anything. So I call the landlord and lo and behold nope he's not seen the guy either, but if he happens to come to town he'll go in the apartment to check on the water lines and such and he'll call us to let us know what he finds out. Ok great, that works for me. After finishing that small detail my officer heads home for supper, and I settle in for some chatting and watching the Bud shootout practice on Speed channel. Phone rings.....oh goodie. I answer to which a self important windbag (can't give out names sorry) proclaiming he's being stalked and due to who he is, we know who's stalking him (sadly enough, ya we did) and he wants to get this shit nipped in the bud. So I holler at my officer interrupting his supper to inform him of this fellow's prediciment and he hightails it to the guys location. Upon his arrival both the stalker and stalkee are there. We've dealt with these fine folks for upwards of 2 1/2 years off and on so we know them quite well. And it's always bullshit kinda stuff...former lovers that have it in their heads that the other one is always out to get them or make them miserable in some way, shape or form. Us being the public servants we are, exist to make sure that the other leaves them alone because heaven forbid, they see one another in such a large metropolitan area such as ours. Well my officer informs them they've managed to leave us out of their quabbles for the last 6 months or better, we'd like it to stay that way and in all honesty we're tired of their shit. (All true but not very good for public relations.) We're expecting a complaint to be lodged against him in the morning. All of this and we've not even been on duty for an hour, NOT the way we wanted to start our night as it looms ominous possiblities for the rest of the 11 hours we have to spend together.
Next call.....well before I tell this story I have to give some background so you can truly appreciate how retarded it really is...
There are certain addresses in our fair town that there must be some kind of gasses or something seeping up from under the ground below them. These addresses are magnets for idiots to be quite frank. For the last month we've been dealing with one of these addresses. One of the incidents was that the tenent in the home (it's a rental) was being bothered by her mentally unstable ex husband. Repeatedly we were called over there to shoo him off because he was harrasing her. Then one day, a call to come over there because he's ranting and raving, refusing to leave. Our Chief of all officers was on duty, and goes over there, tells this fella to come on over to the car and the guy threatens to kill our Chief and refuses to put down the weapon in his hand......oh not bright on his part. He does start walking towards the Chief but stops and refuses to come further saying Chief is going to have to bring him in by force. Now mind you, the guy was/is a mental case, but still pretty stupid. After backup arrives the guy surrenders and they bring him in.....just to do a mental health committment on him. The next week another incident.....while working I get a frantic 911 call that there is a guy at that same address that had barged his way in and is getting the shit kicked out of him. I send an officer over and that was an understatement. My officers end up bringing in 3 guys, two in pretty good shape and one that well to be honest....I thought he was black. Don't see many of them in our area as it's a small southern town, still very racist in many ways. Then I notice the guy's arm in my monitor....it's white......WTF? His head is black and his arm is white. I had to know what that was about so I leave my desk to wander down the hallway to the holding area. What I saw there would have been enough to make some chuck their cookies. To say this guy had been beaten was an understatement and the reason he looked black in the monitor....he was completely covered in blood. Not for the squeamish...one of his eyes was swollen shut, his nose obviously broken, various knots forming on his head, some nasty looking lacerations on the top, and side of his head, both lips broken open, and that was just what I could see from 4 feet away. These are the kind of incidents we've been encountering at least every 4-5 days at this address, we're getting kind of tired of it to be honest. Now with these kind of things in mind, read tonights incidents from people associated with this address. First a person that's moving out calls demanding to know why the people moving in were stopped by my officer and told that they were stopped because of living at that address and possible drug activity going on at that address. Ok first, my officer hadn't made any traffic stops at that point, second, even if he had, he's not gonna be telling the people that's why he stopped them. I told her that as far as our shifts, we hadn't done it and I had no idea what that was all about. She was appreciative of the info and we hung up on good terms. Fifteen minutes later another woman calls, this didn't go so well. It was the Mom of the guy that was "accused" of dealing the dope in and out of there DEMANDING to speak to the officer that stopped her boy and his fiancee'. Oy, I go through my spiel all over again and inform her my officer is out on patrol, I'm the only one here. OMG she goes off on me, and while she's raving I'm feeling my ear start to get wet.....ACK........it's oozing through the phone to get me. Great just what I need, to loose more grey matter. I swear my intelligence diminishes just a shade everytime I speak or deal with these kind of people. Luckily once I've been away from them for a bit, it comes back. It's odd, but I swear it's true. Finally she stops for a breath and I ask her for a call back number, I'll have my officer to call her to ease her concerns. After a shocked gasp that I would do that for her, she gave me her phone number and thanked me and hung up. WHEW TG, the end of the phone calls. Luckily that's as far as it went at that address tonight because by the time my officer dealt with that woman, I really think he might have put alot of us out of our misery and just went over there shooting.
At this point, I'm convinced, somebody is out there flipping over rocks and these things are crawling out of their winter hiding spots. I swear it, wish they'd quit flipping over our rocks so they'd quit escaping and we could enjoy our spring that's well on it's way to our fine area.
Being a lowly police/fire dispatcher isn't as bad as one might think most of the time. Ya ya we have to deal with the occasional life threating situation, but as long as you keep your head on your shoulders and don't freak out things go pretty smoothly. Dealing with the disgruntled public, thats another thing that's just part of the nature of the beast. Let them vent, answer their questions and if worse comes to worse, tell them that if they can't be sensible, there isn't much you can do to help them....if all else fails, while they are threating your job hang up on them. Yes it's probably rude, but living in a town of 2,500 people, it's not THAT surprizing if you know the mayor and everyone on city counsel and doesn't mean your THAT important. No we can't tell them that per se, but we certainly aren't expected to put up with verbal assaults over the telephone either because we can't tell them they are being an idiot. Most of the time, our shifts are pretty boring and that's good. Until spring......that's when the unsavory characters start crawling out from under their rocks.....OHHHHH GOODIE. There is an upside to that though. It's an ego boost. You realize that while you have your faults, they could be oh so much worse. Tonight was one of those nights for me most certainly.
Being a Friday night, we (me and my on duty officer) were expecting to have to work. Nothing unusual we've become accustomed to that and actually look forward to it since the rest of our week is usually pretty boring. Now that being said, our night didn't start quite on the note we would have prefered. I got here first as I came in a half hour early so the guy I was taking over for could go home and feed his cows during daylight. There was a note for my night officer from a local manager at a local factory, didn't think too much about it. My officer came in about 15 minutes after I did and I gave him his note and went back to my chatting. After calling the guy that left the message, he left to go do a well being check on a fellow that lives in one of the local slum apartment buildings. The guy hadn't shown up for work the last 4 days and they were getting concerned. Well he went to check, the guy's car wasn't there, no one answered the door when he knocked, no funky odors met him at the door, all seemed well. Nothing more he could do, unless we have pretty good evidence of something hinky going on, we can't go kicking in doors and breaking into personal residences....that pesky 4th amendment prohibits us from that, go figure. I got a call from the officer telling me what he'd found out (or lack of what he'd found) and asked me to call the guy's landlord to see if he knew anything. So I call the landlord and lo and behold nope he's not seen the guy either, but if he happens to come to town he'll go in the apartment to check on the water lines and such and he'll call us to let us know what he finds out. Ok great, that works for me. After finishing that small detail my officer heads home for supper, and I settle in for some chatting and watching the Bud shootout practice on Speed channel. Phone rings.....oh goodie. I answer to which a self important windbag (can't give out names sorry) proclaiming he's being stalked and due to who he is, we know who's stalking him (sadly enough, ya we did) and he wants to get this shit nipped in the bud. So I holler at my officer interrupting his supper to inform him of this fellow's prediciment and he hightails it to the guys location. Upon his arrival both the stalker and stalkee are there. We've dealt with these fine folks for upwards of 2 1/2 years off and on so we know them quite well. And it's always bullshit kinda stuff...former lovers that have it in their heads that the other one is always out to get them or make them miserable in some way, shape or form. Us being the public servants we are, exist to make sure that the other leaves them alone because heaven forbid, they see one another in such a large metropolitan area such as ours. Well my officer informs them they've managed to leave us out of their quabbles for the last 6 months or better, we'd like it to stay that way and in all honesty we're tired of their shit. (All true but not very good for public relations.) We're expecting a complaint to be lodged against him in the morning. All of this and we've not even been on duty for an hour, NOT the way we wanted to start our night as it looms ominous possiblities for the rest of the 11 hours we have to spend together.
Next call.....well before I tell this story I have to give some background so you can truly appreciate how retarded it really is...
There are certain addresses in our fair town that there must be some kind of gasses or something seeping up from under the ground below them. These addresses are magnets for idiots to be quite frank. For the last month we've been dealing with one of these addresses. One of the incidents was that the tenent in the home (it's a rental) was being bothered by her mentally unstable ex husband. Repeatedly we were called over there to shoo him off because he was harrasing her. Then one day, a call to come over there because he's ranting and raving, refusing to leave. Our Chief of all officers was on duty, and goes over there, tells this fella to come on over to the car and the guy threatens to kill our Chief and refuses to put down the weapon in his hand......oh not bright on his part. He does start walking towards the Chief but stops and refuses to come further saying Chief is going to have to bring him in by force. Now mind you, the guy was/is a mental case, but still pretty stupid. After backup arrives the guy surrenders and they bring him in.....just to do a mental health committment on him. The next week another incident.....while working I get a frantic 911 call that there is a guy at that same address that had barged his way in and is getting the shit kicked out of him. I send an officer over and that was an understatement. My officers end up bringing in 3 guys, two in pretty good shape and one that well to be honest....I thought he was black. Don't see many of them in our area as it's a small southern town, still very racist in many ways. Then I notice the guy's arm in my monitor....it's white......WTF? His head is black and his arm is white. I had to know what that was about so I leave my desk to wander down the hallway to the holding area. What I saw there would have been enough to make some chuck their cookies. To say this guy had been beaten was an understatement and the reason he looked black in the monitor....he was completely covered in blood. Not for the squeamish...one of his eyes was swollen shut, his nose obviously broken, various knots forming on his head, some nasty looking lacerations on the top, and side of his head, both lips broken open, and that was just what I could see from 4 feet away. These are the kind of incidents we've been encountering at least every 4-5 days at this address, we're getting kind of tired of it to be honest. Now with these kind of things in mind, read tonights incidents from people associated with this address. First a person that's moving out calls demanding to know why the people moving in were stopped by my officer and told that they were stopped because of living at that address and possible drug activity going on at that address. Ok first, my officer hadn't made any traffic stops at that point, second, even if he had, he's not gonna be telling the people that's why he stopped them. I told her that as far as our shifts, we hadn't done it and I had no idea what that was all about. She was appreciative of the info and we hung up on good terms. Fifteen minutes later another woman calls, this didn't go so well. It was the Mom of the guy that was "accused" of dealing the dope in and out of there DEMANDING to speak to the officer that stopped her boy and his fiancee'. Oy, I go through my spiel all over again and inform her my officer is out on patrol, I'm the only one here. OMG she goes off on me, and while she's raving I'm feeling my ear start to get wet.....ACK........it's oozing through the phone to get me. Great just what I need, to loose more grey matter. I swear my intelligence diminishes just a shade everytime I speak or deal with these kind of people. Luckily once I've been away from them for a bit, it comes back. It's odd, but I swear it's true. Finally she stops for a breath and I ask her for a call back number, I'll have my officer to call her to ease her concerns. After a shocked gasp that I would do that for her, she gave me her phone number and thanked me and hung up. WHEW TG, the end of the phone calls. Luckily that's as far as it went at that address tonight because by the time my officer dealt with that woman, I really think he might have put alot of us out of our misery and just went over there shooting.
At this point, I'm convinced, somebody is out there flipping over rocks and these things are crawling out of their winter hiding spots. I swear it, wish they'd quit flipping over our rocks so they'd quit escaping and we could enjoy our spring that's well on it's way to our fine area.
Tuesday, January 22, 2008
Just another night in paradise...
It's Monday...for me anyways. After having a glorious 6 days off I really wasn't looking forward to trudging to the salt mine. I did though just like I do any other Monday. I am lucky in many ways, because being a police/fire dispatcher and jailer in a small town isn't the busiest job. I am fortunate enough to hang out with all my friends in IM most of the time. I would probably loose what little mind I have left due to boredom if it weren't for those wonderful peeps that keep me amused (ya'll know who you are :D). After having a few days off, some things became glaringly apparent to me tonight, and you my wonderful reader get to read all about them.
First of all, I work in the same office as my Dh. For 2 weeks of the month, our shifts overlap, he's here till about 11pm. Normally this isn't a big deal, it gives us a chance at some adult conversation and to go over things concerning the kids out of their earshot (amazing how their hearing improves when you don't want them to hear you huh?). Other times though, I'd give just about anything to have one of us someplace else. For instance, the night before last we had some freezing rain/sleet move in that glazed the entire area in ice. Luckily I was at home and didn't have to work as the amount of slide off's and accidents was high. Unfortunately, my Dh worked. He does security patrols around our fair town and assists the officers when he can. So upon him crawling out of bed at 10 this morning I got to hear all about the dumbass that would not take his foot off the brake and kept sliding on the ice. I could definitely understand Dh's irritation with the fellow because he simply would NOT listen. I don't mind hearing what happens at work when I'm not here for the fact I am nosey. I also like to be one step ahead of the general public, I feel I'm entitled since I'm having to deal with it on a professional level. All that aside, I hear about several more slideoff's and a couple of accidents, then all about this guy that wouldn't take his foot off the brake. I knew I'd hear this all day so I hid, in my bed, under the guise of taking my before work nap. Fast forward to 6pm....walk in the door to the office and guess what I'm hearing at 6:15pm...yup about the putz that wouldn't take his foot off the brake pedal. I hear this roughly 5 more times until 10:30 when he went home tonight. Oy and he says I ramble...
Well in the middle of listening to that story for about the 3rd time, I realized it'd been awhile since I'd done our monthly test. I logged in and sure enough, in true SHE fashion I found myself 3 months behind in my monthly tests. Luckily the boss hadn't noticed it yet so thought I'd save him the trouble of leaving me a nastygram "reminding" me to get them done. Sounds like a great way of tuning him out or getting him out of my hair right? WRONG....Tickers....Who the hell came up with that grand idea. I don't mind taking the tests, they kill time and are sometimes interesting. What has made me dislike them more than Dh's ex-wife is the page tickers. Now I have always been a fast reader, probably always will be so when I have to wait a minute and a half to turn the page on this test it really annoys the begeebers outta me. Top that with the slide off story and I'm ready to go through the ceiling. Even worse, Dh noticed I was taking my tests and announced to me "Oh I know how those bore you because of that page lag, I'll keep you company." OH JOY!!! Of course I didn't say that but I did tell him that if he had something else to do I was really ok. I know he meant well but oh my, with PMS setting in, not the time. Luckily someone else came in and he went to bestow his story upon them.
Flash forward to about 3am.....I am bored, VERY bored and I go to flip through the tv channels. Why is it at 3 am it's all "male enhancement" commercials, insomnia commercials, and bed commercials? Oh and you can't forget the get rich quick commercials by any means. I guess they think people are loosing sleep because they aren't big enough, have insomnia, a bed that sucks, or they don't have oodles and gobs of money. GREAT......Just what I want to watch. All of my friends have long went to bed and I'm stuck with this muck. Makes me want to just strangle who ever actually obliges these marketers with "I'm SO glad I saw your commercial!" and buys this stuff.
Man I need to find more things to do at work.......
First of all, I work in the same office as my Dh. For 2 weeks of the month, our shifts overlap, he's here till about 11pm. Normally this isn't a big deal, it gives us a chance at some adult conversation and to go over things concerning the kids out of their earshot (amazing how their hearing improves when you don't want them to hear you huh?). Other times though, I'd give just about anything to have one of us someplace else. For instance, the night before last we had some freezing rain/sleet move in that glazed the entire area in ice. Luckily I was at home and didn't have to work as the amount of slide off's and accidents was high. Unfortunately, my Dh worked. He does security patrols around our fair town and assists the officers when he can. So upon him crawling out of bed at 10 this morning I got to hear all about the dumbass that would not take his foot off the brake and kept sliding on the ice. I could definitely understand Dh's irritation with the fellow because he simply would NOT listen. I don't mind hearing what happens at work when I'm not here for the fact I am nosey. I also like to be one step ahead of the general public, I feel I'm entitled since I'm having to deal with it on a professional level. All that aside, I hear about several more slideoff's and a couple of accidents, then all about this guy that wouldn't take his foot off the brake. I knew I'd hear this all day so I hid, in my bed, under the guise of taking my before work nap. Fast forward to 6pm....walk in the door to the office and guess what I'm hearing at 6:15pm...yup about the putz that wouldn't take his foot off the brake pedal. I hear this roughly 5 more times until 10:30 when he went home tonight. Oy and he says I ramble...
Well in the middle of listening to that story for about the 3rd time, I realized it'd been awhile since I'd done our monthly test. I logged in and sure enough, in true SHE fashion I found myself 3 months behind in my monthly tests. Luckily the boss hadn't noticed it yet so thought I'd save him the trouble of leaving me a nastygram "reminding" me to get them done. Sounds like a great way of tuning him out or getting him out of my hair right? WRONG....Tickers....Who the hell came up with that grand idea. I don't mind taking the tests, they kill time and are sometimes interesting. What has made me dislike them more than Dh's ex-wife is the page tickers. Now I have always been a fast reader, probably always will be so when I have to wait a minute and a half to turn the page on this test it really annoys the begeebers outta me. Top that with the slide off story and I'm ready to go through the ceiling. Even worse, Dh noticed I was taking my tests and announced to me "Oh I know how those bore you because of that page lag, I'll keep you company." OH JOY!!! Of course I didn't say that but I did tell him that if he had something else to do I was really ok. I know he meant well but oh my, with PMS setting in, not the time. Luckily someone else came in and he went to bestow his story upon them.
Flash forward to about 3am.....I am bored, VERY bored and I go to flip through the tv channels. Why is it at 3 am it's all "male enhancement" commercials, insomnia commercials, and bed commercials? Oh and you can't forget the get rich quick commercials by any means. I guess they think people are loosing sleep because they aren't big enough, have insomnia, a bed that sucks, or they don't have oodles and gobs of money. GREAT......Just what I want to watch. All of my friends have long went to bed and I'm stuck with this muck. Makes me want to just strangle who ever actually obliges these marketers with "I'm SO glad I saw your commercial!" and buys this stuff.
Man I need to find more things to do at work.......
Sunday, September 16, 2007
Wanted:
WANTED:
Working brain cells wanted. Need many as mine have been totally fried by 7 kids, 2 paying jobs, 2 very demanding non paying job (aka Mom and Dear Honey), family that thrives on drama. If you find any of mine that I may have lost (you'll recognize them I'm sure, they will be sporting a Jack and Coke in one hand and have their thumb up in hopes of hitching a ride to someplace warm year round where there is sand, sun, and free drinks :D....and no kids), please scoop them up and send me a comment as to where they were found and where to pick them up. On the other hand, just shoot the lil jerks for abandoning me when I need them LOL.
All kidding aside, if I make it thru my childrens childhood with any of my neurotic pathways still intact it will be a small miracle. I always knew being a Mom wasn't gonna be easy but geez criminy, never knew it was gonna be like this. I know I drove my Mom to the brink of insanity more than a few times, but even with the "your kids will be 7 times worse than you" curse over my head, I never imagined this. I was ornery (ya go figure huh :D) but OMG this surpasses anything I imagined my "payback" to be.
A tomboy at heart, I never got too much into the typical girl stuff that most girls do. Make-up, ya i wore it, but only because I found it much easier to hook up with guys that I wanted when I wore it. (Don't even say what your thinking LOL). Skirts were well pretty much the same thing.....with the added bonus of I looked better in them than most of my competition when vying for the guy I wanted. Hairspray.......ahhhhh now there is a multi purpose item. First use... the empty pump bottle...wash out well, and used to transport alcholic beverages to places that they were banned aka school field trips, prom, dances, you get the picture I suppose. Second use aerosol cans...combined with a lighter made a really great flame thrower that sure impressed the guys. Last but not least, to actually use on your hair (how dull huh?) Oh forgot another use, after finishing a charcoal drawing or pencil drawing, spray it with hairspray so it wouldn't smudge on the way to my drawing class. Ok enough of hairspray, on to other girly items now. Nair :D, now there is a fun one....many guys that were asses to me and/or my friends would find himself without an eyebrow (or maybe two), various other uses including words Naired into their leg hair or chest hair or back hair as a minor punishment for being a jerk :D. Lipstick HAHA, hated wearing it, but it was great to "decorate" things with :D. Not a complete list, but you get the idea.
Keeping that in mind, comprehend this........6 kids total (NO not all of them are biologically mine, if they were well I'd be in a nuthouse someplace pulling my ear, my "blankie" tucked under my arm, and sucking my thumb while sitting indian style on the floor of my padded room rocking back and forth). Of those how many boys do you think we have been blessed with? TWO!!!!
Meaning the remaining FOUR are girls! OMG.......and all but possibly 1 of those are girly girls! ( The 4 yr old, there is still hope for her :D) I am lost in a daze of cheerleader lala land. Estrogen seeps from every nook and cranny of our house. It's awful! Being of the t-shirt and jeans fashion club, I feel like the deer in the crosshairs when confronted with "Do these shoes match this outfit?" or "Ewwwww there is a spider" "Ewwwww you squashed it with your shoe....and you're gonna wear it now!" Oh another thing, if I hear IDK (yes said just like that) one more time, I swear I'm gonna......... well swear. Tis enuf to drive a crazy person sane!
Now I know everyone is under this misconception that boys are the hardest to raise. NOOOOOO NOOOOOOO NOOOOOOO.......you try living with a houseful of girls when your not one of "them" (aka girly girl). I dare ya, no I quadruple dare ya on that one. Gimmie the boys anyday!
Working brain cells wanted. Need many as mine have been totally fried by 7 kids, 2 paying jobs, 2 very demanding non paying job (aka Mom and Dear Honey), family that thrives on drama. If you find any of mine that I may have lost (you'll recognize them I'm sure, they will be sporting a Jack and Coke in one hand and have their thumb up in hopes of hitching a ride to someplace warm year round where there is sand, sun, and free drinks :D....and no kids), please scoop them up and send me a comment as to where they were found and where to pick them up. On the other hand, just shoot the lil jerks for abandoning me when I need them LOL.
All kidding aside, if I make it thru my childrens childhood with any of my neurotic pathways still intact it will be a small miracle. I always knew being a Mom wasn't gonna be easy but geez criminy, never knew it was gonna be like this. I know I drove my Mom to the brink of insanity more than a few times, but even with the "your kids will be 7 times worse than you" curse over my head, I never imagined this. I was ornery (ya go figure huh :D) but OMG this surpasses anything I imagined my "payback" to be.
A tomboy at heart, I never got too much into the typical girl stuff that most girls do. Make-up, ya i wore it, but only because I found it much easier to hook up with guys that I wanted when I wore it. (Don't even say what your thinking LOL). Skirts were well pretty much the same thing.....with the added bonus of I looked better in them than most of my competition when vying for the guy I wanted. Hairspray.......ahhhhh now there is a multi purpose item.
Keeping that in mind, comprehend this........6 kids total (NO not all of them are biologically mine, if they were well I'd be in a nuthouse someplace pulling my ear, my "blankie" tucked under my arm, and sucking my thumb while sitting indian style on the floor of my padded room rocking back and forth). Of those how many boys do you think we have been blessed with? TWO!!!!
Meaning the remaining FOUR are girls! OMG.......and all but possibly 1 of those are girly girls! ( The 4 yr old, there is still hope for her :D) I am lost in a daze of cheerleader lala land. Estrogen seeps from every nook and cranny of our house. It's awful! Being of the t-shirt and jeans fashion club, I feel like the deer in the crosshairs when confronted with "Do these shoes match this outfit?" or "Ewwwww there is a spider" "Ewwwww you squashed it with your shoe....and you're gonna wear it now!" Oh another thing, if I hear IDK (yes said just like that) one more time, I swear I'm gonna......... well swear. Tis enuf to drive a crazy person sane!
Now I know everyone is under this misconception that boys are the hardest to raise. NOOOOOO NOOOOOOO NOOOOOOO.......you try living with a houseful of girls when your not one of "them" (aka girly girl). I dare ya, no I quadruple dare ya on that one. Gimmie the boys anyday!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
