Saturday, November 22, 2008

Everything is ok....relatively that is....kinda

With my Dad that is...he ended up in the hospital on Wednesday to Thursday afternoon for some heart racing, coldness in his feet and legs and pressure on his chest. They did a dye stress test on him and didn't find anything wrong with the ole ticker so we're thankful for that right now. He's still got other issues which they are working on figuring out what they are. Might be an infection, might be cancer, and then there's that pesky borderline diabetic thing they found during his blood testing. Scary...of course, but manageable. Now we're in the hurry up and wait mode, for his specialist's appt's to figure out the rest of the problem (or if there is one).

As for the custody/child support hearing on Thursday all I can say is...I wanna hit that...with my car that is...on the other hand, no I don't, I like my truck as-is, without the hood, grill, and bumper all buggered up. Plus I don't think vehicular manslaughter charges would go over very well with my boss at all. In a nutshell this is what happened:

(excerpt from Missouri Case.net file on our proceedings...I deleted the names in the interest of privacy)

11/20/2008 Docket Entry: Hearing Continued/Rescheduled
Text: Parties appear with attys. A conference is held in chambers. The Plaintiff requests that a GAL be appointed for the minor child. Attorney J.H. is so appointed. The court requests that the Presiding Judge assign another Judge to hear this case as Judge E will be retiring as of January 1,2009.

Now for those who don't know what a GAL is it is a guardian ad litum for the child. Here is a link to explain what they are and what they do:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Legal_guardian#Guardian_ad_litem

We don't have any problem with her and her attorney requesting one except for one small detail. WHY THE HELL DID THEY WAIT UNTIL NOW! Oh that's right, Katie's gonna be 17 in less than a week, that's right. She doesn't want to help financially support her daughter. Oh hell who am I kidding, she doesn't want to help with anything in regards to her daughter unless it makes her look like a martyr or hero to everyone. The GAL is actually a good idea in all honesty, but it majorly pisses me off and frustrates me the only reason they asked for one is to draw this crap out and stall off Spongebob paying child support. I know it probably seems like all we care about is the money. To be honest, we do. Seventeen year old's are expensive. Especially if the child is as involved in school activities like clubs and sports like Katie is. There's the inevitable fees for the activities, and then the other expenses like food and such for when they have games out of town and the like. Ten dollars every Friday doesn't sound like much, but when you add that up over the course of weeks, it tally's up. It's not that we care about the money per se, it's just there are the rest of the household bills that HAVE to be paid NOW, not in another 6 months when this finally goes back to court. It's frustrating to have to juggle the way we do. Especially when Spongebob and her new hubby can spend $170 on a horseback search and rescue class, eat out, rent a house out in the country because they don't want to live in the house that Spongebob owns in town, they can go on trail rides and all kinds of things while we're scraping by to make the bills and while we'd LOVE to be able to take off for a weekend to do something with the kids, can't afford to. So ya, it's about the money, but moreso it's about what the Sponge is depriving ALL of us of. I know Karma will take a nice big bite out of her ample posterior for this, but patience isn't one of my virtues so I'm getting pretty pissy that it's not happening yet that I can see.

On the other hand, Katie is withdrawing from her Mom. She's upset that her Mom won't help. Katie's upset that her Mom doesn't give a rat's ass about what she wants, it's all about what her Mom wants. She sees the things we would like to do, but can't due to her Mom being less than helpful or supportive. We don't tell her these things of course but she's 17, she's smart, she can figure it out on her own. Then again when we tell her that we won't just give her the money for stuff right out, she has to call her Mom and ask for some help with it, that does kind of give it away I guess. Katie gets tired of being told no, that her Mom doesn't have the money, that she's living with us, it's our responsibility, or whatever else it is her Mom tells her. Then her Mom wonders why Katie doesn't want to go over to see her or even talk to her on the phone. Gee, go figure. Of course we're to blame for that, the way we spoil her and are brainwashing her against her Mom. Hogwash, we tell Katie she really needs to go see her Mom, Katie just doesn't want to. We won't force her to either. We encourage her to call her Mom (other than to ask for money), but there again, Katie doesn't want to. It's a sad situation, but I can see both sides. I have to say that I side more with Katie though (some of that's personal though, you have to stop and consider her Mom had an affair with my former husband while buddying up to me, but that's another post for another time). I've been in Katie's position with my own Mom albeit slightly differently situation (there again, another post for another time). There are no easy answers to this one, other than Katie needs to spend a lil more time with her Mom, her Mom needs to help financially and emotionally support Katie, and I can't hit the Sponge with my truck cos I can't afford to loose my job. Oh well, like I mentioned, Karma will come around eventually and get her, I just have to have faith in that and our legal system that they will do the right thing by everyone mixed up in this mess.

Other than all that, things are pretty ok. Daniel goes back to work Monday, Thanksgiving is Thursday, and I actually get it off this year. Well aside from the fact that presents me with a difficult situation of my own concerning my parents. I cook Thanksgiving dinner. It's a no brainer for me. It's easier on me than getting everyone ready and herded around to go to either my Mom's or Dad's house. It's easier on the kids as they have all their stuff at home, and that helps keep them out from under my feet and them amused while all the adults visit, clean up, and prepare the meal. Plus add in that my Dad's house is a mess, and well his woman is about the worst housekeeper I've ever seen. Don't ask me what color their kitchen floor is because I honestly couldn't tell you. It's not because I haven't looked either, it's that dirty when I've been there. At Mom's, she refuses to pay the $$ for the natural gas for her furnace so for heat she uses kerosene heaters. The fumes from those things give me a massive headache and the fumes just plain stink. The fumes also seem to permeate EVERYTHING they come in contact with so showers and laundry are a must after being over there. Not what I want to have to deal with after a huge meal. So all in all, it's easier just to do it at my house. I have more room, a cleaner house, and no fumes that are going to make me cranky and miserable. Where my problem comes in is the fact that I can't have my Mom, Dad, and Jane in the same place together. Mom gets to showboating, Jane gets wound up because of her inferiority complex, then that leads to me, Dad and Daniel getting wound up because of their behaviors. Right now I'm actually hoping that Dad goes back to work so I can just invite Mom, and sometime between Thanksgiving and Christmas have a holiday dinner with Dad and Jane. I know it sounds like I am favoring my Mom over my Dad on this and I suppose I am. Mom doesn't have any of our other family close...well except for my lil brother, but I don't see him and his g/f having dinner at their house. That would leave my Mom all alone on Thanksgiving and well...that idea just bothers me. Jane has family around to spend the holiday with if Dad's gone so I don't feel bad about her. Mom on the other hand...well ya, it bugs the hell outta me, the idea of her being alone on Thanksgiving. There's not an easy answer here on this one, but I'll figure out something like I always do.

That in short is my weekend. Sorry about the rant in there but I'm just madder than hell about the custody/child support thing.

Ahhh now I feel much better...thanks for letting me make your eyeballs bleed with my ranting over a crappy week.

1 comment:

miss shannon said...

(((Chris)))... sorry to hear about further delays in court... I hope it's not too long that things are resolved... I understand your frustrations too well... Prayers for your dad that's it is nothing serious...